The Extraordinary UnOrdinary You by Simone Knego

Author:Simone Knego
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: BookBaby
Published: 2020-08-28T21:34:38+00:00

Lean In

One morning, after I got Ari up and dressed, I then focused on getting the other kids up and ready. But when I went downstairs to make breakfast, I couldn’t find Ari anywhere. I panicked and started screaming his name, “Ari! Ari!” which I’m sure probably scared the absolute crap out of him. He probably thought he was in trouble and that I was upset with him, because why else would someone scream? But I was completely panicking!

Thinking back on that experience, I am sure it was traumatizing for him, even though I was truly only concerned with his welfare. I don’t know what his life was like before he came to our house. All I know is that when he cried, he cried with silent tears.

I went outside, desperately looking for him. I looked in the pool. I looked in the canal. I went through every place I could think of outside and inside the house. I was totally freaking out and felt physically sick to my stomach.

Finally, in a complete panic, I called my mom. “You have to come over,” I said. “I can’t find Ari anywhere! If we can’t find him, I’m going to have to call the police.” That was my next step. All I could think of was that Ari had only been with us for a couple of weeks, and I had already lost him.

When my mom came over, we scoured the house again. It had been two hours since anyone had seen him, and my heart was sinking. We finally found him lying under the dining room table, under the curtains, at the perfect angle where he couldn’t really be seen. I ran to him. He had totally shut down again and looked scared to death. But I pulled him into my arms and hugged him. I am sure this was equally as confusing to him. I was yelling his name, then hugging him. He didn’t understand, but I wanted him to know he was safe.

Although Ari tried to hide so he wouldn’t have to go to school, we still felt that school was the right place for him. He wasn’t afraid of school. He was afraid that we wouldn’t come back for him. For two months, he would lie at that door waiting for me—and for two months, I would promise him I was coming back. Every day when I came back, he had a huge smile on his face. It was me building up trust and helping him know that I would always come back for him.

Ari’s behavior of shutting down whenever something unknown happened continued. But over time, it started getting better. Not only was the frequency going down, but the intensity was going down as well. Instead of him staring off into space for two hours, it became an hour and a half. And at school, he moved from lying by the door to lying down in the classroom.

Eventually, when he really understood the language and he tried to shut down, I would say, “Ari, we’re not shutting down.

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